I’m in a state of post Christmas reflection. Sorting through the flotsam of ritual. Along with leftover turkey, discarded tinsel and empty bottles, I am saying goodbye to things that no longer have a purpose. It occurs to me that the end of the world came and went. I must have slept through it. And I make a mental note of what I will carry with me into this new world. This brave new world.
Ten seems like a good number. Even for a non Mathematician. In numerology it becomes one. I like the resonance. This is a list for one. I don’t intend to create a comprehensive, generalised or even useful itemised notation that will serve others. No. On this journey of the interior, I intend to travel light.
1. My cat. She doesn’t belong to me. Animals don’t belong to people. I belong to her. I know she loves another more dearly than me and it doesn’t bother me. I’ve lived with that feeling before and I’ll survive. She will come though. I asked her.
2. My green ukulele. I had piano lessons as a child. It cost my parents thousands they could ill afford. I’m tuneless and tone deaf. When I picked up a ukulele recently, I discovered a diva.
3. Bananas. They are a soul food. They are golden. They are a powerhouse of happiness. They are.
4. A secret. Not all needs to be shared. This may be the most interesting thing about me. Or not.
5. My primal rage. I’m not ready to leave it behind. That’s for when I die.
6. The pictures in my heart. Neuroscience tells us that memories are located somewhere in the brain. When I remember, I draw it from my heart. I feel it rising up from within. I can remember in every colour, in any light, in any moment. I remember the moment I met each important person in my life, I remember what we spoke of, how you looked and how your eyes moved. I choose to carry this with me, in all its glittering enormity, because this is not burdensome.
7. A quest. Every warrior has one.
8. My freedom. I need it for my quest.
9. A sense of the ridiculous.
10.Enough love to remake a world.
So then. I have my list. Ready anytime now.